Yesterday was time for sentiment with the list of favorite holiday movies. Today has been a far crappier day, so I'm putting aside George Bailey to get into the ways people completely miss the point of everything.
The Merry Christmas Crusade
The make-believe, Fox Channel-driven “War on Christmas" is driving me crazy. If someone wants to say “Happy Holidays!” go for it. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Cheery Winter Solstice, I don’t care. It’s called BEING NICE. Take it when you can get it and smile back.
Mayhaps Fox and other soldiers of the Happy Holiday Wars should focus on real wars instead. I dunno, maybe look into the genocide and systematic rape in Sudan/Darfur. But nooo, the real horror is Happy Holiday-wishing! (gasp!)
Those Damn Lexus Commercials
You know them as soon as you hear that infuriatingly tranquil music. Then the genteel Golden Retriever delivers keys to the owner, or the parents reward their teenager (teenager!) with a Lexus of their very own. These commercials are driving me to socialism. If you’ve got enough money to surprise someone with a freakin’ Lexus for Christmas, then maybe your money can be better directed.
Every Kiss Begins with Kay
The taglines kill me. “Tell her you love her with diamonds.” “When words aren’t enough.” “Speak gold.” “Forever, Now.”
Now this is coming from an admitted jewelry lover, so it’s not easy. But really, are we really advocating the substitution of words and acts of love for jewelry? Even I, at my most shallow and sparkly-loving, can’t get behind that. Supplementing words with the sparkly, I’m all for it. Telling me you love me with pressurized carbon? Try again.
2 comments:
Jen, I cubic zirconia you, today and every day. *cue popular 80's song with synth beats and new Christmas lyrics*
As the proud owner of a Lexus AND as a member of the Greater Salt Lake League of Socialist Voters (recently merged with the Provo Politburo), I take offense at this post.
We must remember that socialism is all about controlling the modes of production and the only way we will make any progress in this country is to engage in systematic and comprehensive class-based social inversion of dominant and hegemonic practices. Otherwise our movement is sunk. Dead in the water, as they say.
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